Why do they always come to me?

One thing that drives me into a towering rage is doing over the phone support. When someone rings me and asks how to rotate their monitor 90 degrees, I want to scream! A process that would take a normal person two seconds of reading takes 20 minutes of trying to tell someone how to get to their desktop. RAGE! I just don't understand, why can't they just do it themselves? Are they lazy? Do they hate me? WHY DO YOU HATE ME! I was pondering this last night when it hit me. Every person who has ever rung me at work is just the slave mind for some kind of terrifying overmind! A retarded, lazy, stupid overmind that hates technology but uses it every day and can't be bothered to learn the simplest functionings of its machine so it rings me!

I realised seconds after this revelation that people are just stupid, lazy and ignorant when it comes to technology, even though they use it EVERY FUCKING DAY! Learn how to use a computer you ignorant bastards. But Mr. Technician, I hear them cry, my emails don't work! I can't get online because I've installed three antivirus programs and I'm an idiot! I formatted my Computer when all I was trying to do is overclock my Hard drive! It honestly, truely, hurts to look at you, because I'm afraid that by looking at you, I'll catch the stupid and forget to breathe. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I hate you, and I am better than you.